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Super Enthusiast

by Macseal

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1.
Everyone’s falling back in love Falling back in love Good luck keeping your friends cause nobody’s falling for ya These thoughts I thought I’d buried Came knocking at the door It felt so ordinary That’s why I craved it more Everyone’s falling back in love Falling back in love Good luck keeping your friends cause nobody’s falling for ya For ya For ya
2.
You said that everyone deserves a friend, Then you withered away under the weight from your lack of them You dug your feet in, But you just kept slipping While the rest just kept on staring The rest just kept on staring I don’t want to say I want to I don’t want to leave you so soon Guess I’m too late I’ve made up my mind Once more without a trace In a state of mind I could never face I know I’m walking too slow Could you wait up? ‘Cause I just keep slipping While the rest just keep on staring The rest just keep on staring I don’t want to say I want to, I don’t want to leave you so soon I don’t want to say I want to, I don’t want to leave you so soon
3.
03:39
You were born in a crowded room With nothing left to lose except yourself Your brother said, “Take a seat right next to me And hold your head as high as you can” You grew up not quite exactly how you wanted, But in the end you know it’s okay Face the facts, you’re facing up against a blank screen, And you’re caffeinated poorly So stop for a second and wonder why you tried in the first place Why you tried at all It’s clear to me Always been hazy for you “What a shame,” your brother said His fingers crossed behind his back They’re getting white from making fists into the night My feet are getting soft in the grass Grab onto anything Shake the barrel clean So stop for a second and wonder why you Tried in the first place Why you tried at all It’s clear to me Always been hazy It’s clear to me Always been hazy
4.
02:42
Oh no, it’s happening again Stuck in the shower recalling attempts At conversation And now I’m hearing voices in my head They’re telling me not to listen to them That’s too much caffeine for today I wish I could pick and choose My memories and which ones to Retain and which ones to remove The bad ones, they stick like glue They're the gum under the desk of the boy that I once knew Who would’ve guessed that growing up Meant that I would outgrow you? The view is better now.
5.
02:22
I asked you how was the party? Are you still here alone? I’ll have some more luck in two months Spat out and off towards home… ...plate of Fenway Park In heavy quotation marks Ran off when I saw you two Ran straight out of that pitch black room Where we were singing songs Well, I interpreted it wrong Unless you schemed it perfectly And you knew all along Back to Fenway Park In heavy quotation marks Ran off when I saw you too Ran straight out of that pitch black-- Back to Fenway Park In heavy quotation marks Ran off when I saw you too Ran straight out of that pitch black room
6.
Wait ‘til the song ends And hold each other close ‘Til the smile on your face turns upside down again, And you say the same thing That you wanted to That you needed to But you couldn’t find the words You couldn’t find the courage to
7.
I wanna die happy, if that’ll ever be Cause honestly, who really knows what they want anymore? Why don’t you settle in? Forever foreign settlement Possessing zero qualities of modesty Honestly, Just react unnaturally What's better than fitting in? Don’t bother tryna figure it out Well now that I’m happy, what's even left to see? The tiring shortcomings don’t mean much anymore Why don't you settle in? Forever foreign settlement Possessing zero qualities of modesty Honestly, Just react unnaturally What's better than fitting in? Don’t bother tryna figure it out Bother tryna figure it out Dear mom, I’ve been feeling so down A Guinness record of humility Well, everyone’s perfectly mapped it out And I’m camping under stained sheets Daily…
8.
They reserve a special kind of defeat For when your new home spits you back to old They expect a swift and solemn retreat Back to the hole that you first crawled out of You’re on a bridge While they’re drawing it You’re calling out And they’re ignoring it And the lines aren’t perfectly drawn But your heart’s been dragging along And I know it hurts extra hard Sitting on the steps you graduated from They leave you no clue for what to say or what to do When that red house leaves you blue and cold You pulled the roots out, realized none of them grew Deep enough to ground you through the snow You’re on a bridge While they’re drawing it You’re calling out And they’re ignoring it And the lines aren’t perfectly drawn But your heart’s been dragging along And I know it hurts extra hard Sitting on the steps you graduated from
9.
You’re falling apart at the seams You say it’s all in the cards ‘cause it helps you sleep But you sit upright Melatonin’s just no match for a fight And you’re growing up again When I ask how you are, you flash your teeth You blame it all on the stars and laugh at me When will I understand Bigger than my hands might just mean it’s not meant to be held? Cause that's growing up again Well I’ll just give you all my money Tell me what you want Red is the new green once I see all your problems solved (Give you all my money Tell me what you want) Well I’ll just give you all my money Tell me what you want Red is the new green once I see all your problems solved (Give you all my money Tell me what you want)
10.
Trace the lines down my back Your twitching fingers on attack I swear, I swear, all this talk is the death of me I could see this coming And it hurts just as hard when I say your name When I hear mine it doesn’t feel the same I just keep running through the motions again When I say… Picture perfect I never meant to figure it all out Never meant to distance myself Just need to find an easier out In a moment of weakness, I crawled in bed Focused my breath just to clear my head But I laid wide awake With the thought of your face And I said… I told you that I would never change And you told me that you would do the same Now you’re all my anxieties in one place Picture perfect I never meant to figure it all out Never meant to distance myself Just need to find an easier out Picture perfect I never meant to figure it all out Never meant to distance myself Just need to find an easier out Find an easier out Find an easier out It's never fair, it's never fair It's never fair, it's never fair I told you that I would never change you told me that you would do the same Now you’re all my anxieties in one place
11.
02:50
So intricately sewn along And all the while You’re in the safe spot looking on Threading the needle We’re single file under yellow rope Pacified, sweating through the silence We walk home in Meet in the same spot every night And I'm looped through all the same holes Sodium vapor caught you right And I'm helpless We’re single file under yellow rope Pacified, sweating through the silence Silence Oh, how do you keep this going? How can you bear to stand so tall? Oh, cause I get tired of running my way out of these old halls Oh, how do you keep this going? How can you bear to stand so tall? Oh, cause I get tired of running, but that was safer all along

credits

released November 8, 2019

Songs by Cole Szilagyi (1, 4, 5, 7, 8, 9, 11) & Ryan Bartlett (2, 3, 6, 10)
Produced and Arranged by Macseal
Recorded and Mixed by Justin Pizzoferrato at Sonelab in Easthampton, MA
Mastered by Sarah Register
Cover Photography by Dana Lovasz

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‘Super Enthusiast’ out now on 6131 Records

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